PC 509 Communication

Our friend Sandi, who currently lives near London Bridge, has been frustrated by the sudden closure of the local Hot Yoga studio. Frustrated by its closure over a month ago, but now more and more angry, yes, I know it’s a yoga studio and yoga and anger shouldn’t be on the same page, by the total lack of communication. No one responds to emails, no one suggests monthly membership will be refunded and much more importantly there’s no indication as to when it might reopen. Members drift, find somewhere else that ticks most of the boxes, and by the time it announces it’s reopening, there won’t be any students. Why don’t individuals and companies really understand how important it is to keep people informed?

I have always believed in the power of communication, good and bad; communication is key – even if you know nothing. When I worked for Shorts, the Aerospace manufacturer in Belfast, a huge percentage of the company was owned by the Northern Ireland Development Board. Suddenly HMG announced it was up for sale but as the weeks went by, no one said anything. On one of my frequent visits from our London office, I noticed how depressed people were, worrying whether they would have a job, who was going to buy the company etcetera; there had been no news. Meeting my Divisional Director, I asked him why he couldn’t tell the workforce anything about the proposed sale, who might be in the running to buy it and he said: “I don’t know anything”. I said: “But you’re the MD and your workforce expect you to know, think you do know, so why can’t you simply say you currently don’t know but you’ll keep them up to date?” Why are people so afraid of saying they don’t know? Communication …..

On our TAP flight to Lisbon on 16th August the plane was fully emplaned, the doors closed and we waited and waited and ……there was no announcement saying they expected to take off in five or ten minutes/waiting for our slot …… or similar, and I thought: ‘Why not?’ Twenty minutes before we ‘pushed back’. Good or bad communication helps us understand what’s going on and helps us prepare.

Last week the UK’s National Air Traffic System (NATS) failed; the IT breakdown led to the cancellation of more than 2000 flights and calls for the resignation of Martin Rolfe, its CEO, as this was NATS’s second major failure in three years. What will happen to him and to NATS is one thing, but for Jane & Joe Public it was the lack of communication – for instance no one knew what was/wasn’t happening; the lack of any contingency planning – for instance there was no extra drink delivered to planes sitting on the tarmac full of passengers for 6 hours; obviously no one within the airport’s management asking the real ‘What if …. ?’ questions. Didn’t we learn anything the last time this happened? Don’t Jane & Joe Public deserve better?   

And while I am ranting about communication, I could mention the sad news that a local hardware store on Portland Road, Nuts & Bolts, is closing tomorrow after 45 years. “Ever since the (COVID) lockdown, there’s been a massive shift from high street to online shopping, which is proving to be the death-knoll for many.” Libby Purves, writing in The Times early this week, wrote: ‘Veteran locals see it bit by bit: the big, confident ironmongery and household store shuts, sabotaged by Amazon; the little boutique, deli and shoe shop give up, independents going first; three more charity shops appear with their 80% business rate exemption.’

Sometimes needing to buy something to solve a problem requires looking around at a range of items or talking to someone more knowledgeable than oneself. Nuts & Bolts was an emporium for bolts, nuts, brackets, fixtures, screws, almost anything metal you could imagine. If I couldn’t find what I wanted when I wandered the aisles or was unsure whether ‘A’ was better than ‘B’, I went up to the counter and spoke to a human. Communicating with a chatbot isn’t the same, is it?

Celina’s nephew Tiago is 14 and goes to school in Estoril in Portugal. Every parent knew the school was building an extension to house his year group, due to open in the first week of September. During the Summer holidays there was no indication that there were problems, no warning, no time for considered thought ….. but the school administrators must have known the building wouldn’t be ready for the first day of term nor apparently any time soon. Parents have been scrambling around to find an alternative school for their child. With some warning, some communication, the school’s reputation might have survived; now it’s in tatters.

The subject of the Duke & Duchess of Sussex’s return to the UK had come up in conversation with Sami in the Hope Café last week. Irrespective as to whether one should care or not, as I am writing about communication there was a mixed reaction to the public notice sent out on behalf of King Charles by the Lord Chamberlain to government officials and the media, seeking to clarify their status. Was it really necessary to remind us they are private individuals rather than ‘active representatives of the monarchy’, non-working royals? Was it to spike their guns as they begin to find their feet and determine how to pay for their privileged lives? Whatever the Royal family does there is interest in this couple from certain sections of society …… and they’re just going to have to live with that!  

My brother spotted this cartoon by Matt …… which delightfully sums up the issue!

And, finally, correct spelling of words is essential for good communication. Seen in Dorset:

We have gas, water and electricity meters, and two metres, short or not.

Richard 18th September 2026

Hove

www.postcardscribbles.co.uk

PS I accept that American English spells metre meter, but this is Dorset not Delaware.

PC 501 Living and loving more, or victim?

In PC 485 ‘Live more? Live less?’ I hoped I got across the idea that we should be striving to do more than just existing. The more I thought about it, the more I recognised that there is a dreadful condition, that of ‘being a victim’; this might stop someone from fulfilling their capabilities and expectations, living more, loving more.

Without doubt, in our lives we will all experience some form of hardship, disappointment, loss, often due to external circumstances or the actions of others. While the initial event may not be your fault, you may feel the victim, and start complaining, shifting accountability to others. Don’t let this ‘victim mentality’ linger. Understanding the psychology behind this mindset is the first step toward regaining control. It often develops as an unconscious defence mechanism, to protect oneself after experiencing adversity.

Various ideas to get out of this mentality include acknowledging the areas of your life where you do have control and focusing on problem-solving rather than complaining. Whatever happened in the past, is in the past. Uncoupling those events from your current sense of unhappiness and self-worth can allow you to live and love more, today!

On the Sunday before we flew to South America in mid-April, I was walking to Rahmi’s 7-11, to exchange my Sunday Times coupon for an actual paper, and passed Hixon Green, a ‘café with food’, on Church Road. Sitting at one of the outside tables, enjoying the weak Spring sunshine, was a chap who’d recently bought one of the twelve apartments in Amber House. Tom waved and I went to say ‘hello’; he introduced me to his friend Ricky, who was enjoying a glass of Coke. Tom started telling Ricky I practised hot yoga a lot – ‘Six days a week, Tom’, I interjected – and Ricky said: ‘I should start doing something like that, shouldn’t I?’ (Was this a question to me or to himself?)

“Absolutely” I said. “Let me know and you can come as my guest for your first session. How old are you?”

“Forty-three. But listen, I really don’t have time for that.”

Always difficult, to allocate one’s time to all those things you think important, be it work, one’s family, staying in touch with friends, indulging in a passion like singing, playing golf, or going to the gym for example. Many years ago, a CEO client said he didn’t have time to learn a language he wanted to be proficient at. He then admitted he didn’t get up until 0730! I suggested he could fit in an hour of study if he got up earlier; he later called that precious extra time ‘Yates’s Hour’.

I am a lark, preferring to be, as Private Godfrey from Dad’s Army often exclaimed, ‘Up and at ‘em’, early, although he was suggesting tackling the enemy head-on! Maybe the analogy works for taking on the day’s challenges?

“There is a time in the affairs of men which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune.  Omitted, all the voyage of one’s life is bound in shallows and in miseries. On such a full sea am I now afloat, and I must take the current when it serves or lose my venture”. Brutus in Shakespeare’s ‘Julius Caesar’ obviously believed in living and loving more.

At around the same time as I learned that the nephew of our masseuse had died aged 39 from a heart attack, I read that here in the United Kingdom the span of our lives when we might expect to be healthy has declined over ten years to just 60 years. The headline is disturbing, but how the Health Foundation came to the conclusion suggests we should take the result with … a pinch of salt? Firstly, their population sample went from 170,000 households to 80,000 and covered a three-year period (2022-2024) so, as well as being smaller, may well have been affected by the tail-end of the pandemic. Secondly, there was a marked deterioration among young adults, from 91% to 84% reporting good health, the recent focus on ‘mental health’ being a major factor, whereas older women reported being much healthier.

As Mark Twain wrote in his autobiography, mistakenly attributing it to Benjamin Disraeli’: ‘There are three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and statistics’!! More likely we’ll have some 68 years of healthy life, and not something forecast by a small tick box survey.

I have mentioned the victim mentality as I have personal knowledge of one such person. Through the generosity of others, they’ve been looked after, fed, watered and housed, whilst making no discernible effort to get off their butt and start taking responsibility for themselves. Love can be complicated, but sometimes a dose of ‘tough love’ is needed.

My fellow yogi Ian calls a spade a spade and not a shovel: “We all need to dare to …. but we accept we get knocked back …. and then you need to pick yourself up, and start again! The accusation this is ‘bad for my mental health’ is bollocks; it’s exactly the opposite.”

Shakespeare, the great observer, wrote these opening lines for Macbeth:

“Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.”

The co-owner of our hot yoga studio teaches a lot and adds her own take on life to the traditional dialogue. The other day she said the practice of hot yoga ‘prepares one for one’s future’. My own thoughts are that you need to live, truly live, now and not wait for ‘your future’ to arrive. And that at my age I truly believe my ‘future’ has arrived, like NOW. Make sure your life is full of love and fun and don’t ever be a victim; well, not for too long!

Richard 24th July 2026

Hove

http://www.postcardscribbles.co.uk